Zeeland, Michigan – More than a decade after the death of 15-year-old Zeeland East student Zach Kroll, his family continues to work through their nonprofit, Love and Lean, to keep his memory alive and reduce the stigma surrounding mental health.
Not a day goes by that Lori Kroll doesn’t think about her son.
Love and Lean: Zeeland family marks decade of mental health advocacy in son’s memory
“He’s always had a laid-back personality, a quiet, calm spirit about him, but he’s also got a crazy sense of humor, like just one-liners and jokes, he always makes people smile and laugh,” Kroll said. “He’s kind hearted, he’ll pick up other people’s books if they fall, and he’ll be late for class, but it doesn’t matter.”
Whether he’s playing the drums or on the football field, Zach puts his passion into what he does.
“He’s an amazing drummer. He’s on the drum line. And, yeah, he really enjoys it,” said Kroll. “He’s athletic. He played soccer through middle school, then once he started high school, he focused more on drums. And, he got a job at 15 years old at Culver’s.”
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Zach’s death in 2015 shocked the community.
“When it happened, the community, our family, his friends – everyone was very shocked, because Zach was a kid who made everyone smile and laugh, and was always optimistic,” Kroll said.
Kroll said her son has struggled with depression.
“He told me everything, and I just don’t understand why he can’t share with me his struggle with depression. But we don’t have a clue. Not a clue. There is no sign at all,” she said. “We would have moved heaven and earth to help him if we had known.”
She says the stigma around mental health struggles was greater 11 years ago.
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“It just breaks our hearts that he didn’t reach out. Shame and secret – that’s what challenged us to help make a difference in the lives of others, and reduce the shame and secret,” he said.
The Kroll family soon began advocating for an open mental health conversation.
“His life’s purpose didn’t end when he died. I feel like it’s still being carried out in a different way, like it’s part of our story now,” Kroll said. “It’s part of his story, it’s part of God’s story that we continue to reach people and make everyday conversations about mental health, and people feel they’re not alone in this.”
Advocacy began with participation in the Mental Health Foundation of West Michigan’s Stomp Out Stigma Walk in Grand Rapids in 2016.
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“That next year, we had about 50 people – like Zach’s friends, some of his teachers, family – all gathered in Grand Rapids at the Stomp Out Stigma Walk, and we walked in Zach’s memory there,” said Kroll.
It’s a walk inspired by local businesses.
“I had lunch with a friend, and we thought, it’s cool, but what if we can do something here in this area for our own community, still supporting the Mental Health Foundation,” Kroll said.
The name “Love and Lean” comes from a dream of Lori Kroll after the death of her son.
“About a year before, I had a dream and it was Zach’s voice that I woke up hearing him say, love and lean, love and lean, love and lean. And I was like, okay, I don’t know what this means, but I’m going to get up at two in the morning and write it,” he said. “He always loved stick figures. He would draw on his school assignments or the whiteboard at work. And I started to draw some stick figures that went with Love and Lean.”
Love and Lean
The event has become an annual 5K at the Zeeland Stadium, now part of the non-profit Love and Lean.
“This will be our fifth year with the addition of running. We started with 50 people at Stomp Out Stigma, and it has grown over the years. Last year we had about 650 gathered,” said Kroll.
The 10th annual Love and Lean Walk/Run will be held Saturday morning, April 25, at Zeeland Stadium.
“There’s just a sense of community on that day where everyone comes together — maybe they’ve lost a loved one to suicide, maybe they’re struggling alone and feeling alone, maybe they’re walking with someone,” Kroll said.
Love and Lean
Events include sidewalk chalk messages, signs made by local schools, warning signs and live music along the route.
“We have a guitarist and a soloist in the wetlands, so it’s a reflective piece,” Kroll explains. “There is a seventh-grade Cityside and Creekside Middle School band that will play music and encourage people to the finish line. We also have connection beads, so however your mental health has affected you, you will wear the color beads.”
Over the years, the Krolls have raised thousands of dollars for the West Michigan Mental Health Foundation. This year, the fund will also benefit three other non-profits: Team Get Better, I understand, and Win at Home.
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Although she wishes her son was still alive, Kroll said she believes he would be proud.
“I think he will be very happy to see the progress made, hopefully we have saved another life because we opened up about our experience and our journey,” he said. “He would give me a big hug and say, good job, Mom. I miss you, but good job.”
You can sign up for the 10th Annual Love and Lean Walk/Run here.
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